August 5, 2009

Happy F-ing Birthday

Monday was my birthday. I got to spend part of my "special day" at my doctor's office. My urethral pain has persisted on and off for more than three weeks. I've also had random bouts of swelling in my clit. I wanted to get checked out and find out what I needed to do to make it better.

My doctor had just gotten back from a vacation and I could tell he didn't want to be back. I was the last patient of the day and it seemed like everyone wanted to just get out of there.

When he called me into his office, I told him my symptoms. He then told me to go to the exam room and get undressed from the waist down. I know this routine by heart. He used the speculum to take a sample and then used his finger to feel the length of my urethra. I was in agony.

After taking a look at all my samples he met me back in his office. He told me that everything looked normal so it had to be a nerve flare. The problem is, there's no trauma I can attribute it to. Why is it happening now? My first thought was, "Oh God, it's getting worse." I started to fight back tears.

For once, my doctor really didn't have any answers. He didn't have a good idea of how to combat the problem. He told me the objective was to knock out the pain long enough to quiet the nerve.

He told me I could apply Lidocane to the opening of the urethra, if that didn't work, I could use a syringe and inject the Lidocane directly into the urethra. If the Lidocane fails he could give me a shot right in that area. All of these options sounded terrible. I couldn't imagine putting anything in there. I was in so much pain just from his exam that I couldn't sit.

I was troubled because it seemed that he really didn't know what to do with me. What's worse, he didn't have much patience. He was rather flip about the whole thing. He told me that if my condition were getting worse, most likely, the pain would be everywhere and not focused in one spot.

That was of no comfort to me. I cried to entire ride home. I felt so scared and discouraged. I can normally deal with the pain and still have a normal sex life, but this is so bad it's made me gun shy. I'm afraid to try on a good day.

8 comments:

Lora said...

I'm so sorry. I've been lidocained before, and although it was the most delicious 3 hours of my vulvodynic life, it sucked because I was numb. And then it killed me afterwards.

But, Happy Birthday!

My brother and my lifelong best friend were both born on August 3rd too. I love when people I love have the same birthdays. Makes me believe in cosmicy stuff

AK said...

*sigh* I'm sorry it's sucking so much right now. I hope you come out of this flare soon.

And...I know it doesn't mean much because it's over and wasn't the greatest, but happy birthday!

Brieahn said...

This is your normal specialist who is telling you that everything is fine. That seems a bit strange to say the least. Someone who is familiar with you pain trying to convince you that its something small. hmmmmm

I totally know what you mean about injections though. I always wonder what exactly the doctors are thinking when they say "Let me stick a really big needle right in the spot that kills you the most." I recently had a consultation with some doctors from Australia who were visiting my own doctor. They were telling me about this botox treatment they use in order to relieve vulvodynia symptoms. Now shooting botox into my nether-regions is not my idea of a fun time, but this is what I absolutely love about their system.... They completely knock you out when they do something like this. Hello Australia here I come!!!!! My doctor of course talked about his non-preservative localized anesthetic injection...The whole time I was thinking. "How much could a ticket to Australia really cost? and I would get a vacation out of the deal.

Just thought this was a little fun food for thought

amanda said...

I hope you come out of the flare soon. I wanted you to know that I use lidocane. its not so bad. I only use it when i have a flare up or before my husband and i have sex on those not so good days. I have some home remedies that my doctor (he specializes in vulva pain) told me to decrease flares and help when they set in. i hope they help you like they did me.

1. Put 1 TBSP and 8oz of water. Put this mixture in a condiment bottle (like the red and yellow ketsup and mustard bottles). Use this mixture to wash your vagina with. It helps to balance the acidity.

2. take a lukewarm bath (I like mine a little on the hot side) and put in a cup to a cup and a half of instant ocean*. Just sit and relax for a half and hour. I dont remember why he told me to do this, but it helps!
*instant ocean is a type of sea salt used in aquariums.you can find it at petsmart and other pet stores in the saltwater fish section. it has to be this kind of salt. no other brand works as well. he said it has to do with its formulation.
3. Decrease the amount of soda intake and drink more water

4. take calcium-citrate supplements.

I really hope these help you. If you have any questions let me know. If you want the name of my specialist, i would be happy to give you his info

Amanda said...

it would help if I would give you a way to contact me huh?

Amanda said...

it would help if I would give you a way to contact me huh? here is my email. turtleisanalien@aim.com

Sue said...

I was diagnosed with vulvodynia nearly 20 years ago. I've been to doctors, gynecologists, and pain specialists, even a pelvic pain specialist. But I continue to suffer with non-stop pain, and I am so miserable.

Anonymous said...

At present, I am taking 25 mg of amitriptyline which my specialist is hoping will "dull" my pain. I've tried the lidocaine in petroleum jelly, cutting oxolates out of my diet and washing after urinating all to no avail. I've been on the amitriptyline for about two weeks now and see no improvement. I do have a three month supply and go back to the specialist Dec. 17/09. My greatest hope would be to be able to wear jeans for my appointment. I've also given up underwear, slacks and jeans to get some relief. I'm soon to be 68, have suffered with vulvodynia for more than 3 years (didn't even know it had a name until 4 months ago)and I still work three days a week. Luckily I work for a company which sells office furniture and I have my computer on a worksurface that I can work at standing up if I wish and can also lower it to my "sitting" position. I probably stand half my days alternating between positions but it's not ideal. If when I go back to the specialist in three months I've had no relief then I will ask about Botox treatments. I can imagine having this condition for the rest of my life. Has anyone else had botox treatments and if so,what were the results? Is the botox treatment painful. I'll log into this site again in a week or two to see if I have any replies.

thanks,
Retsy