Gardasil: Not Just for Pre-Teens

During my visit to the women's clinic a few months back, I asked the Nurse Practitioner about Gardasil, the vaccine that claims to protect girls against cancer-causing types of HPV.  She thought it probably wasn't as miraculous as it appeared to be, considering there are about 100 strains of HPV, but it does prevent infection from the two major cancer-causing strains HPV-16 and HPV-18.  

Then she told me something I found very exciting: women up to the age of 26 can receive the vaccine.  I just happened to be 25.  Fantastic!  I did some research and called my doctor to arrange for my first injection.  You have to receive a series of 3 shots over the course of 6 months.  I just had my second shot two days ago.  

In my web research, I also learned that Gardasil also protects against the two strains of HPV that cause genital warts.  At this point, it's unclear how long the vaccine is effective.  Some reports claim at least 4 years, others claim only 2.  It will take time to get a survey of the efficacy over time.  I personally hope it's forever.  

I'm currently in a committed, long-term relationship, but I jumped at the chance to get additional protection.  You never know when your relationship will go south and you never know, for sure, where someone else has been.  

I consider myself very fortunate to not have to worry about STDs at this time in my life.  We have both been thoroughly checked and, thankfully, we are both clean.  I have chosen to only use the pill as my form of contraceptive.  

All condoms cause me a great deal of added pain and burning.  I've try latex, polyurethane, and even natural condoms made from sheep intestines.  Those are disgusting!  They smell like formaldehyde.  It was like bestiality and necrophellia all at once!  As soon as I opened it and the smell hit me, that thing went right in the trash.  I will never touch lamb skin condoms again.       

But, I digress.  The point is, if you're under the age of 26, you should do some research on Gardasil and see if the vaccine is right for you.  I think you can never be too safe from STDs.  

If you ask me, my squirrel's nest has more than enough problems without cancer and warts.  

CT-Guided Pudendal Nerve Block: The Jury Is Still Out

I've been very reluctant to post about my CT-guided pudendal nerve block because I haven't seen any positive change.  I actually think I've had a complication or two.  

I don't want to frighten anyone away from considering this procedure.  There were a lot of factors that have tainted the results for me.  

I've had a lot of pain in my left butt cheek, which at times radiates down my left leg.  I feel badly bruised in my left knee, the top of my left foot and my left heel.  Very strange.  It hasn't been constant and it appears to be dissipating.  Thank God.  

In the wake of my yeast infection, my area has been on fire!  I wasn't sure whether it was a nerve flare or if the skin was actually inflamed.  After ignoring it and not sitting at all for a few days it got no better.  There was more of a sharp itch to the burning than my usual pain, so I tried a course of hydrocortisone suppositories.  It was definitely a skin issue and that's finally clearing up as well.  I'm glad I had those lying around.  

My doctor had prescribed them for me a few months back and I hadn't used them.  Boy, am I glad I kept them!  I was going crazy.  

During this time of heightened pain, I've noticed that even standing makes me flare.  It makes sense.  If you stand for too long in one place, blood starts seep out of the capillaries in your lower extremities.   This can lead to swelling and even fainting.  My theory is that there is also a fluid buildup in my moose knuckle.  

I guess I just need to find a balance between sitting and standing at my job.  What I really need is to be able to recline at times, but that's not an option.  

Anatomy of a Yeast Infection

I'm currently taking prerequisite classes in order to get into nursing school.  I've banged out the basic fundamentals, Anatomy & Physiology I & II and Microbiology.  I love what I'm studying and I now have a much more detailed understanding of some of my problems.  

As you know, lately I've been plagued by yeast infections.  They are just the worst.  When you're already so fragile down there, it's the most unwanted visitor.  Unfortunately, I know why Mr. Yeast took up residence in my snapdragon.  

I've been under a lot of stress, from my job, from my loved ones, from my body and one of the best parts about being a woman is your body really wears the signs of stress.  About 2 months ago, I started getting this horrible, painful, cystic acne.  (That REALLY helped with my stress!)  I tried being more active in my skin care routine, but I could not get it to clear up on my own.

I made an appointment with my dermatologist and he reminded me that the last time I came in with a serious case of pizza face was 2 years ago when I switched jobs and bought a new home.  Clearly, stress related.  My doctor decided to put me on the same antibiotic he had given me then.  

Here is the first problem: there are many possible microorganisms that are colonizing my face and causing the breakout.  The best treatment would be an antibiotic with a small range, targeting the specific cause of the acne and leaving other naturally occurring bacteria alone.  That's really not done in dermatology.  The common practice is to give the patient an antibiotic with a wide range.  Hopefully, this medication will wipe out the problem.  Meanwhile, because the drug has a wide range, it also kills off other important naturally occurring bacteria in your body.  

That's how we come to yeast.  Everyone has yeast in their snizes all the time, but your body keeps it under control.  There is a daily struggle between good bacteria that protects your body and bad bacteria that can be potentially harmful.  A course of antibiotics can wipe out the good bacteria in your honey pot.  Yeast is an opportunistic bacteria.  It seizes the opportunity when the bodies defenses are low and multiplies like there's no tomorrow.  

With a more specific antibiotic, this problem may not occur.  There are also prescription medications that can be taken in conjunction with a course of antibiotics like Nistatin or even Diflucan every 3 days for full duration of the medication.  Yogurt and Acidophilus can help too.  

I thought after the first treatment of Diflucan, I would be clear, but just a few days later the yeast infection I had was so much worse.  I strongly advise asking any doctor that prescribes you antibiotics to ask for a medication to protect your body during the course of treatment.   

Pain in the Ass: CT-Guided Pudendal Nerve Block

On Wednesday I had a CT-guided pudendal nerve block.  I hadn't anticipated it would be such an ordeal.  2 days before the appointment I received a call from the office saying that I had to come over an hour before the procedure, I couldn't eat or drink after 6:00 am that day.  I'm under a ridiculous amount of stress at work and unfortunately, I have my fair share at home as well.  I began to have some misgivings.

My mom was kind enough to go with me for the block.  I had to get completely undressed and wear gown.  I got an IV on the top of my left hand.  I was hungry, but cool as a cucumber.  One of the nurses even said, "I've never seen a woman this calm before this procedure!"  

I guess she jinxed me.  I finally got to meet the doctor who was performing the block.  He was very nice, but I think I got a little more information than I needed.  He told me that I needed to be awake enough to tell him if he punctured the nerve.  

That sent me into a bit of a panic.  I was all ready to be knocked out.  I thought all I had to do was lie there and look pretty.  I didn't want to be awake and in pain!  What if he did puncture the nerve!?!  What if this little procedure only made me worse?!?  

I started to feel hot and nauseous.  My mom got one of the nurses and I told her that I didn't want to do it, that I had changed my mind.  She was very surprised.  I was no longer her super cool patient.  I was a hot mess.  I was ready to rip the IV out of my hand myself.  

My mom suggested that I speak to the doctor and see if he could put my mind at ease.  I have to say, everyone on staff that day was just wonderful.  They were patient, understanding and kind.  The doctor and the nurse administering the anesthesia assured me that the risks were minimal and I would be well cared for.  

I decided to go for it.  I had to lie on my stomach with my arms stretched out in front of me.  My ass as in a tube for the CT.  Once they had everything lined up, I was given a local numbing injection in each butt cheek.  It hurt.  Then the big needle was placed on the left side.  "OW!"  Then another big needle was placed on the right side.  "OW!"  I'm not gonna lie.  It hurt.  Those needles were long!

After that second "ow" I was out.  I woke up feeling very happy and very relaxed some time later.  That was a wonderful sleep.  I felt so relieved about everything when I woke up.  Apparently, every time I said "ow" the nurse gave me another dose of twilight.  Good deal!  

I'm not nearly as numb as I have been with the previous nerve blocks.  Unfortunately, I have another raging yeast infection from a course of antibiotics.  And let me tell you, I can feel that!  I wish I couldn't.  

My butt is still very sore from the injections.  I feel like I got a tetanus shot in both cheeks.  

The steroid in the injection is not supposed to take effect for about a week, so I'll keep you posted on if I see some improvement.  I really need to nix this yeast infection first.  It's completely tainting my results and ruining my day!

I have a followup with my doctor some time in the next two weeks where we'll discuss surgery.   The CT-guided nerve block is supposed to be a good indicator of whether or not you should have surgery because it is so much more accurate.  The needle is in the potentially compressed canal.  

Hopefully, I'll have a clear indication of where to go from here.    

The Anatomy of a Pudendal Nerve Flare

I finally got the replacement part for my kneeling chair and not a moment too soon.  I'm in bad shape.  

Last Thursday night I got injured doing my favorite activity in the world.  It's amazing how the slightest shift in position can be the difference between pleasure and days of pain.  Essentially, my partner came down and scraped the front of my snooch a couple times.  Now everything around the opening of my urethra (sorry, I haven't found a better term for that) feels inflamed. 

The next day when I became aware of the extent of the injury, I found myself thinking, "Ha, what would a pudendal nerve decompression surgery do for this?  Nothing!"  

Oh, how short-sighted we can be...

The initial trauma sent pain signals through my pudendal nerve to my brain.  Those pain signals caused the nerve to flare.  It was only a minor scrape.  I have no doubt that it has healed by now.  The flare is drastically worse than the original injury.  At this point, the only source of relief is lying on my back.  I can't even stand without pain.  

I have my first CT-guided pudendal nerve block next Wednesday.  At this rate, I should definitely be able to test of efficacy of that procedure.

The results should also verify if the decompression surgery is right for me.     

   

Height Adjustable Workstation and New Questions

I gathered up my nerve and asked my boss if he would allow the purchase of a height adjustable workstation.  Although somewhat reluctant, he agreed because the price was reasonable.  

I am so relieved.  I didn't want to pay for it and I didn't want to fight for it.  And now it's here!

I've been using it for 2 days.  It's not the best.  It's wobbly and small, but it's better than a stack of boxes.  It will also be a better match for the kneeling chair, whenever I get the correct part.  

I've taken a number of professional risks by being up front about my condition.  But because I did, I'm getting the accommodations that I need.  I'm extremely fortunate to work for people who are understanding.  I don't think most offices would tolerate this issue.  

With the changes that I've made to my workspace, I've begun to think about delaying surgery.  Maybe if I can avoid the primary source of my pain, I can also avoid the need to go under the knife.  

I'm really not sure what to do.  I've been so hot to get sliced for so long, but now I'm starting to worry about potential complications.  

What if the surgery actually makes my condition worse?  

What would I do then?  

Surgery is the last resort.  

That's a really scary thought.      

Vulvodynia with a Side of Teeth

Before I had any proper diagnosis, before I ever heard the word, "vulvodynia," I said my vagina was ANGRY.  It became a separate entity from myself.  It was a hateful, torturous creature that caused me debilitating pain.  

I always felt like my vagina was a monster, hideous and cruel.  I was continually victimized by it's wrath.  My therapist, at the time, told me I talked about my vagina like it was a thing in other room and not a part of my own body.  

After months of anticipation, I saw a movie that embraces the monster that lurks between our thighs.  Teeth is the story of a girl who discovers that her vagina can serve as a weapon.  She has been blessed with a legendary vagina dentata, toothed vagina.  The protagonist is transformed from a woman ashamed of her body to one who is empowered.  

Teeth is an over-the-top horror/comedy that is not for the faint of heart.  There's a decent amount of gore.  I'm sure you can imagine who/what falls victim to her special fangs...